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Wasn’t it just Thanksgiving?

You might believe that I’m totally relaxed about the holiday since I’ve finished decorating my house…but you would be wrong. I have such weighty questions as 1) What should we have for Xmas Eve dinner? Older Daughter has volunteered to make lasagne, John and I will pick up some Beecher’s Mac and Cheese at Costco, and I traditionally make Russian teacakes and frosted sugar cookies. (dessert) I sent out a group email/invitation to solicit side dishes and have only heard back from Younger Daughter who will contribute roasted veggies and garlic bread. 2) Since I’m going to John’s family’s Xmas Day get together, am I expected to give presents to his granddaughters? I have no ideas for gifts. Although John would say no to the gifting, will I feel foolish/guilty not bringing any? 3)I’ve been very clear that I don’t want to exchange presents with adults, including John. Yet the past couple years, John has shown up with a festive bag full of goodies for me from Trader Joe’s. I’m not saying I don’t appreciate them, plus they’re delicious, but I THINK my dilemma is: what are people’s expectations?

“Oh, the weather outside is frightful”–but not snow. I don’t mind the rain, but an atmospheric river plus some wind makes me feel like moss is growing on me. The weather is also interfering with my walks. 🙁 And I hope my poor cyclamen don’t drown! Because I live on a hill, I’m not in any danger, but there will be flooding, and possible landslides. There’s even been a death from a falling tree, coming loose from the saturated ground. In the news article, it was stated that the deceased was the only one not wearing a seat belt; I’m not sure that would have helped in this case though.

My friend who was coming up to meet Ian cancelled due to the scary freeway conditions, but I still got some baby holding time. Look at those plump cheeks! His older brother as a newborn resembled Patrick Stewart (one of my favorites!) whereas Ian’s jowls remind me of Winston Churchill. His hairline too! 🙂

I find babies’ expressions hilarious! Or grandma is just scary? I ended up with enough free time to head up to Les Schwab (tire place) so they could fix my tire sensor issue. Although the sensor is never on normally, the manager (Clinton) who hates my car with a burning hot passion, informed me that one of the rear sensors on the snow tires was bad. $270 later I had all new sensors and was ready to drive away, not-very-happy but relieved. Then…can you guess?

THE TIRE SENSOR CAME ON.

So, I marched back into the store, put my keys on the counter and calmly (aren’t you proud of me?) said, “My tire sensor is STILL on.” I wanted to have an absolute fit and say some cutting comments; however, the sensor alert did eventually go away after the mechanic re-learned the tires again. Don’t ask me to explain re-learning; I’m so sick of that word! Is the problem now resolved? Only time will tell.

Watching: John and I enjoyed the football game yesterday–a Seattle rout after the disappointing first half. I did a lot of delighted shrieking at the 100-yard kick off return for a touchdown. Go, Seahawks! Other than that, I haven’t found much on TV to capture my interest.

Reading: While sitting at Les Schwab, I re-discovered “The Hallmarked Man”; I’d forgotten who many of the characters were but got more into the story than I did on the first try. My library copy of “The Correspondent” came in and I’m trying not to speed read it. I’m loving it so far and want to savor every word.

Comments

46 responses to “Wasn’t it just Thanksgiving?”

  1. Catalyst Avatar
    Catalyst

    You are NOT required to give any gifts.

    1. Margaret Avatar

      Even if John does to my grandsons? It’s not a requirement, just awkward if we’re on different pages with it. 😬

  2. MARY Avatar

    For the granddaughters I think I’d try to find some gold foil covered coins and maybe a little toy, like a fidget spinner or something. If John’s giving you Trader Joe’s stuff, maybe make a loaf of bread or some cinnamon rolls or something for him?

    My sensor always stays on for a couple of miles after they work on the tires, but then it goes off on its own.

    1. Margaret Avatar

      Maybe they have some cute little things like stickers at the Dollar Store? John is always happy not to exchange gifts and then he gets me something. It’s nice, but maddening. My sensor stays on forever until Les Schwab does something about it, so frustrating.

  3. Doug M Avatar
    Doug M

    Margaret I am so sorry about your car and the whole tire sensor thing, it makes me NOT miss owning a car, I think they are getting far too complicated in this day & age. And that repair cost… I would’ve been seeing red too! On the other hand, you gave me a real chuckle with the Baby Ian and Winston Churchill comparisons–my God too funny but I do see it now! He is a beautiful little boy for sure… your daughters sure give you some handsome little grandsons!

    1. Margaret Avatar

      I’m hoping that the issue was fixed for that amount of money, but I’m pessimistic. The tire people are going to blame it on the car and I don’t really think that’s the whole problem; the sensor is never on until I take it in to them. 🤬My younger daughter says that Ian isn’t very photogenic. He’s way cuter in person than he is in photos!

  4. Kay's Musings Avatar

    Oh wow! I can see the stress you are undergoing. I’ve just been through a delayed Thanksgiving and the stress of it activated my vertigo a bit. And now it’s Christmas and New Years to think about. I’m exhausted just thinking about it. I don’t envy your having to think of gifts for little ones. I had to have my son tell me what I should get our grandsons.

    1. Margaret Avatar

      I wouldn’t say it’s bad stress, just a lot of holiday hosting that I’m not used to. It’s only been recently that I’ve done Xmas Eve. It was always at my parents’ place, then my mom tried to do it with us bringing all the food. I’m still adjusting to the details of putting on a party.

  5. Jay Avatar

    Our Christmas Eve has been Chinese for the last several years, although not always on the actual Eve to accommodate everyone’s schedules.
    I’m always perplexed by what to get for my grand-nephews. They live far away and we don’t see them. But they are family, and the only 2 we have, so not out of hand. I want them, or really their parents at their ages of 1 and 3, to know we are thinking about them. So far I am sticking with small toys.

    1. Margaret Avatar

      I could go for some Thai but my Older Daughter is much more traditional. Our family always had lasagne for Xmas Eve dinner at my folks’, and this is our first holiday without Mom, so it’s fitting. Buying gifts is SO challenging. I never know what people (adults or kids) want, need or already have. I do little toys and stickers, which the older boys like to use for various things.

  6. Maureen Avatar
    Maureen

    I’m leaning in to Christmas this year, which is unusual for me. Gifting has always been a conundrum for me, but switching to homemade food gifts helps. Little token gifts are perfectly fine as well IMO. Time with loved ones is what matters, I’ve been told (recently).

    1. Margaret Avatar

      Homemade food (even bought food) is a good way to go if you know that person’s tastes. John usually does a decent job except for some reason he thinks I prefer dark chocolate to milk. (I don’t)

  7. Luftmentsch Avatar

    My family are cutting back Chanukah presents this year, except for children (R and Nephew). It’s sensible, but a childish part of me is a little upset! Even though I just ask for more books I don’t have time to read or shelf space to store. R is too young to really understand presents. She isn’t really interested in toys anyway, only people. Nephew does enjoy them.

    It is frustrating to agree a rule then have someone (John) not follow it.

    The link for re-learning didn’t work for me as I’m out of the area. I did an internet search, but all I got was psychology pages about learning again. Maybe the mechanics need to re-learn how to fix your car?

    Yes, I don’t think wearing a seatbelt helps much if a tree falls on your head…

    1. Margaret Avatar

      Sometimes I can easily think of gifts I want but there are those in my family (or in my late husband’s family) who buy gifts that they would want or think others would like. One year I got a doll and my husband a train (which I still use for the tree) because they wanted to revisit a childhood Xmas for some reason. I wasn’t much into dolls as a child and certainly not as an adult. Does cutting back on presents mean none for adults? Even small ones? Sorry the link didn’t work! It’s essentially electronically pairing my car’s Tire Pressure Monitoring System with the sensors on each tire.

      1. Luftmentsch Avatar

        The children are still getting presents! We are cutting back on adult presents, although not entirely. My sister and BIL aren’t getting anything for E and I and vice versa. My parents are getting something for E and I (and sister and BIL) as a couple, not as individuals. My parents said not to get them presents at all, but I am still getting them something small as I couldn’t face not getting them anything. E and I are supposed to be exchanging presents, but E can’t think of anything she would like (in our family, we usually just tell each other what to get, as it’s easier than guessing!).

        E and I are just so exhausted by R’s stomach upset that we are struggling to think about Chanukah, even though it starts on Sunday night!

      2. Margaret Avatar

        The gift giving sounds more complicated than just getting small things for everyone. You can always see how it works and change it next year if you need/want to. I’m concerned about R’s stomach upset. She’s had it for a while. What does the doctor say?

      3. Luftmentsch Avatar

        The doctor hasn’t said very much at all, just that there’s nothing obviously/worryingly wrong. They’ve referred us to a paediatrician, but we don’t know how long the waiting list is. I think it’s probably a vaccine side-effect and they don’t want to say anything in case it puts us (or other people) off vaccination.

    2. Margaret Avatar

      That’s upsetting because you do want her protected and especially in today’s world, that means vaccinations. I know I was a colicky baby and older daughter couldn’t eat a whole bunch of things because they come through in her breastmilk and upset Obro’s tummy. Dairy was a prime culprit and any kind of cabbage related food. He spit up a lot as it was!

  8. Michael Avatar

    The whole Christmas gifting thing drives me crazy. Should I get a gift? Should I not? I never seem to know. When I had my Subaru, the sensor light would always come on, and in my mother’s Outback, the light always comes on too. Maybe it is a Subaru thing?

    1. Margaret Avatar

      That’s interesting to know. Perhaps a defect with Subarus although tire manager Clinton claimed that mine was the ONLY Subaru they had any issues with. The dilemma around gift giving is part of why Xmas stresses me out. 🙁

  9. AC Avatar

    As per usual, I have no doubt that you will carry it all off in style. I think that you should consider getting John something, but I am clueless as to what.

    1. Margaret Avatar

      Thanks for your confidence in me, John-perhaps misplaced. 🙂 Maybe I should get him fancy food also. Then I could help him eat it. A win-win!

  10. Betty Renfroe Avatar
    Betty Renfroe

    Don’t give gifts. It’s all rather silly.

    Russian tea cakes…I love them with good coffee.

    Got my truck to the shop. Always something.

    Sun is shining here!

    Ian is changing so quickly! All I have to put air in tires is a hand bike pump. I miss my husband of 50 years who took care of all those things. I’m mechanically challenged. I can assemble stuff either. No brain. 🧠

    1. Margaret Avatar

      I want the older grandsons to have gifts to open but I think it’s silly to exchange adult gifts. None of us need anything and should get rid of stuff, not get more. Russian teacakes and frosted sugar cookies are traditional in my family. I’ve been making them since I was a teenager! Have you ever choked on a Russian teacake? (the powdered sugar) I have! But I continue to eat them. 🙂 Vehicles and houses, there is ALWAYS something! I’m jealous of your sun. Ian is gaining weight, so that’s great. He’s such a snuggle bear.

  11. addofio Avatar

    I empathize/sympathize re:tire sensors. The ones in my van were coming on for no good reason a few years back, and it was worse for me than not having them at all because I would assume there was a problem that needed to be fixed RIGHT NOW. The very first time the light came on, there was a nail in one of the tires, and I had to change it myself because it was Mother’s Day and nothing was open, a truly miserable experience (it’s my camper van, and the tires are very heavy). Ever since, the light causes my anxiety to ramp up (there are stories). Les Schwab would check the tires and the sensors, find nothing, and tell me “don’t worry, sometimes it takes awhile for the light to go off.” Eventually the one here in town admitted that just maybe I needed to use the ones Mercedes sells instead of the generic ones Les Schwab sells. They were quite a bit more expensive than the generic ones, but they did indeed do the trick. And since I had sprung for more than one set of the generic ones, the shop deducted the price of the latest set of generic from the cost of the Mercedes set. Worth it for the peace of mind.

    1. Margaret Avatar

      I found that with my printer–using generic cartridges didn’t work, only the name brand. (more expensive of course) I’m like you and when the tire sensor is on, I assume there’s something wrong with my tires. According to John, sensors are persnickety and do need periodic replacement. I didn’t even know there was a sensor in each tire! I can’t imagine changing a tire although I’m familiar with the process. Tires on rims are HEAVY, and the camper van is bigger than my Subie. Ouch!

  12. Martha Avatar
    Martha

    Car places are maddening. Things like that seem to happen to me almost every time. I hope the issue with your tire sensor is actually fixed. I think some kind of little gift for John’s granddaughters would be nice, but not necessary. I hope you get more responses to the request for the Christmas Eve sides soon.

    1. Margaret Avatar

      It’s hard to know (from my ignorance) whether they’re upselling or not. Then I feel taken advantage of. 🙁 I think I’ll look around at the Dollar Store for a few small things for the granddaughters. No responses to my email yet. Boo!

  13. Pixie Avatar

    I had my oil changed the other day at Jiffy Lube and I’m pretty sure I got upsold on something I didn’t really need. Fuck that irritates me. I won’t happen again.
    If the service guy doesn’t like seeing you, they should just fix things properly.
    Ian is a cutey pie. They are so funny, little babies. How is your daughter doing as mother to two now? Is their dad helping? I hope so.
    We don’t have anybody around on Christmas, both sad and a huge relief. We take Miss Katie out for lunch to the mall, which is what she likes, and then we have a quiet meal, just the two of us.

    1. Margaret Avatar

      I never know if they’re taking advantage of me and I’m sure that they’re pressured to sell more services. I try to depersonalize it. When Les Schwab warned me that I needed brakes quite a while back, I told them I’d take the car to Subaru to get a second opinion. The dealership said no, I didn’t need brakes for a while; that was several years ago. Now they’re getting close to replacement according to both places. Ian is much cuter in person than in photos. He is so noisy-grunting and squeaking all the time. The boys’ dad is helping–for the moment. I can’t forget how his family and he abandoned YD and Anders for about a year though. I’m distrustful. Is Jack spending the holiday with his mom and her family?

      1. Pixie Avatar

        He spends Christmas eve with us and on Christmas morning, we take him to his grandma’s and usually spends one night there. I haven’t heard anything from them to plan this year’s Christmas yet, they’re not great at planning ahead, unless it’s a holiday.

      2. Margaret Avatar

        That sounds like John’s family. Very random. I pinned his daughter down last time we saw her because I’m not last minute. I was nice about it, but I need to know who will be at my house on Xmas Eve. It would be nice to know what people are bringing too. Sigh.

  14. Ed Avatar

    Being a child growing up during a time when eggs were considered bad for you as well as all forms of fried foods, our traditional Christmas meal was all those things we deprived ourselves from the rest of the year, particularly when it came to breakfast. We would have lots of eggs, fried potatoes, biscuits and gravy, little smokies, etc. To some extent, that tradition still holds for us.

    The lady killed by the falling tree made our evening news last night.

    I recently had my own issue with a tire sensor. One went bad and needed replaced. I had just put new tires on maybe three months prior. On every single occasion before, they have always added new tire pressure sensors to the cost of replacing the tires. But on this particular time, they told me they hadn’t replaced the previous sensors since they were still “good” despite running out of battery three months later. Unfortunately, I couldn’t find my bill I paid when replacing the tires to verify if new sensors had been installed or not so I grudgingly paid and waiting through a second appointment to get the sensor replaced.

    1. Margaret Avatar

      I would happily eat that meal; I love eggs and fried potatoes. Yum! Your tire sensor story makes me aware that I need to be more on top of this situation since I have my tires swapped twice a year. John says that sensors do need periodic replacement, and I doubt that mine have ever been done. How long do you think most sensors last? Since they change out my tires for free, they wouldn’t have given me new sensors.

      1. Ed Avatar

        I can’t answer that question. But back when they were charging me for new sensors with every tire replacement, and assuming they were actually putting in new sensors each of those times, they were getting replaced about every three years. My wife puts a lot less miles per year on her vehicle and I’m guessing the tires on it only get replaced every five years or so and the TPMS’s lasted that long without issue.

        My new vehicle displays the pressure of each tire up on the instrument cluster so I know the pressure of every tire and don’t have to wait until a light goes off to check and see exactly how low or which tire needs air. Although the tires are still new and have nitrogen in them from the factory, I think I will really love this feature when they are older and filled with air, which is more prone to leak out with time than larger nitrogen gas molecules.

      2. Margaret Avatar

        John’s Outback shows the tire pressures too; mine is a year older and a Forester which doesn’t have that capability. I don’t know how old these winter tires are, but probably at least 3 years. So, as long as the tire sensor doesn’t come on, I’ll be content with the replacement.

  15. Susan Avatar
    Susan

    Ian is an adorable very expressive baby, and I love the reference to WC!
    Regarding gifts, I always have a few boxes of good chocolate to gift. Some of my friends say: No gifts but then they give gifts. My boxes of chocolate are great for this situation. Also, when I go to someone else’s home for a meal, I bring chocolates. (For me, when in doubt, bring chocolate!)
    I find children love even the smallest of gifts, and I love seeing their joy opening up a gift. Yes, I do gift, modestly.
    The Subi tire pressure light issue is real. For me, the entire problem has disappeared by having Costco install 4 new tires. My question is: What does Costco know that the Subi dealership does not?

    1. Margaret Avatar

      Ian is full of grunts and squeaks–very cute! But as YD and I remark, infants really do look like little 80-year-old men. LOL Chocolate is always a great gift; my late husband (who loved gifting but not getting them) always had extra food related items in case of a gifting surprise. Pepperidge Farms collections were his go to. I’m happy to know that I’m NOT the only Subie with tire sensor issues. New tires would include new sensors, I think? Les Schwab, where I bought the tires, swaps them on and off for free. The sensors in them are the originals. (not now though)

  16. kayak woman Avatar

    I vote for no gifts. In our fam people make lists (mostly with links) to things they actually need/want. I just clickity click. Last year we were gifted with a charcuterie package. It would have been fine except we were passing a norovirus around. Ugh. Also ugh to tire sensors.

    1. Margaret Avatar

      That’s how I vote too! However, the more I think about it, the more I’m leaning toward picking up a few small things at the Dollar Store for John’s granddaughters.

  17. Steve Avatar

    Well, I’m glad the “re-learning” solved the tire problem (whatever the heck it means). The adults in my family don’t mess with gifts. We just give things to the kids. (And even then it’s usually a gift card!) I might get Dave something, but like another commenter said, most of us already have too much stuff.

    I don’t think rain will hurt your cyclamens unless it physically washes them away!

    1. Margaret Avatar

      The cyclamen are looking a little bedraggled, but we’re getting a break from the rain right now so maybe that will help them perk up. Every time I have a house or car issue I learn something new so I guess that’s a positive. 😬 I didn’t realize that all 4 tires had sensors and that they should be periodically replaced. I haven’t been doing that because the tire place swaps mine on and off for free, since I bought them there and they’re on rims. Live and learn, as the saying goes. Little gifts are fine as long as both parties know that there will be one coming. John fools me every year.

  18. Robin Avatar
    Robin

    Hi Margaret, US Thanksgiving and Christmas are sooo close together. In Canada we have at least a couple months.😆 I love the photos of Ian. I am seeing the Winston Churchill resemblance. I hope your tire issues are well and truly over. We had a chance to test our AWD and snow tires today. More snow with another sixish inches is on the way tonight and tomorrow. Sigh…..winter started way too early this year!

    1. Margaret Avatar

      They are way too close together, especially on the years when Thanksgiving is later in the month. I would rather celebrate Canadian Thanksgiving! Babies look remarkably like elderly men. 🙂 You need the AWD and snow tires much more than I do but I feel more confident having them on. I live in a very hilly area and have had my fill of sliding down them sideways. (rare, but it has happened!)

  19. Tonya Avatar

    My car CONSTANTLY has some dash light on, mostly the low pressure tire light. John has a scanner thingy that gives the “code” of what’s wrong, and sometimes a tire is a little low, but usually it’s nothing! I’ve dealt with stupid sensor lights for decades now because my Bug was notorious with it, too! Often associated with emissions parts, and the shop never could identify the issue. I hate ’em!

    I would probably give a small gift to John’s grandchildren. They’re pretty young, right? Maybe coloring books with those cool pens/markers (that wash off), or bubbles, sidewalk chalk, or books! I wouldn’t get something that “screams” Dollar Store, but I think one CAN get some good finds there!

    There is definitely a “brotherly” resemblance between Ian and Anders. It’ll be fun to see how they interact with each other as time goes by.

    Thankful for this pause in the firehose, but nervous about what’s yet to come.

    1. Margaret Avatar

      I do so hate those dash lights because being me, I’m never sure if anything is actually wrong! The sensors can be so persnickety. As you advised, I went up to the Dollar Tree and picked out some cute little gifts: a Bluey Bingo set for the 4-year-old (we played Bingo last time we were over there) and a Frozen puzzle for the 7-year-old, plus some glow stick bracelets for them in a variety of colors. I thought Ian looked a lot like Anders but have changed my mind. It’s a mess downtown with roads and a bridge closed; I’m happy to be a Hill Person.

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