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A View Into My Universe

“Positivity meant solving the problems. Solving them and letting them go. Or it meant not solving the problems but coexisting with them peacefully.”-Ann Patchett, “Whistler”

A few weeks ago, as John and I were going into the local hardware store for plumbing supplies (blech!), I spotted bags of tulips in the front and was tempted by a couple pretty two-toned ones. In famous last words, “I have plenty of tulips!” Then yesterday while weeding and putting weed-resistant granules on my new flowerbeds, I had an epiphany: Spring will be so much more colorful if I plant tulips in these areas too! So, I’m off today to buy a collection of styles and hues of tulips. In a bit of a dilemma, should I put them in rows, in clusters or in a random configuration? John votes clusters and I’ve eliminated rows; if some didn’t bloom, there would be holes and that would bug me. A lot.

I’ve needed positive therapy this week between worry about Younger Daughter (constant but sometimes more intense) and concern about Ian, who has been suffering from nummular eczema.

Poor little guy! My sister-in-law, a proudly ignorant anti-vax, anti-mask, natural remedies person (of obvious political proclivities), suggested beef tallow to my daughter. That sounds not just icky but ineffective. I won’t go into all the medical care and interventions her family has used in the past since that just makes me furious. I did have a decent chat with my brother and her at my niece J’s volleyball game; J. is a new student at a nearby Christian school and was delighted that I attended her game. She played very well and her team surprisingly won. (they were 1-11) She’s a libero, which I had to look up. (a back court player–mainly defensive in setting and passing) I was shocked at the scoring; the team used to only score if serving. I guess the rules have changed since I played volleyball in P.E. in 1972!

The fall colors are cheering me up, not to mention the blue sky and high 60s. It’s my kind of weather.

John also made me laugh with catnip spray which caused Mari to act even stranger than normal. 🙂

Obro’s eclectic outfit was delightful. He’s a quirky kid and so lovable. That sweet smile…

Screenshot

Beware of scams! I doubted this message was real because I couldn’t see any purpose in texting a temporary number, whatever that even is. Just in case though, I contacted both my daughters. I think OD was a little offended that I thought it might be her.

Screenshot

As someone who uses capitals, punctuation and even semi-colons in my texts, I obviously wouldn’t fit in with Generation Z. Should I have pointed out to OD, the Millennial, that she didn’t put a period at the end of her sentences? 😉

Now, onward to Tulip Town aka McLendon Hardware!

Comments

53 responses to “Tulip Therapy”

  1. Marie Godsey Avatar
    Marie Godsey

    I’ve learned that periods at the end of texts means you’re not in a great mood or angry. (Not so in blog messages!) My mom often texts “Okay.” I take it as annoyed.
    Hopefully Ian gets some relief! That looks so itchy.

    1. Margaret Avatar

      He’s such a sweet baby that to see him in discomfort is awful! I think she’ll use some steroids just to get it under control, but that’s not a long-term solution. I didn’t know that about the period at the end of text messages. I must sound angry all the time! 😳

  2. Pixie Avatar

    I doubt that you can have too many tulips. Ask the Dutch:) I tend to plant everything so that there is no empty spaces which can cause problems and require editing.
    Poor little Ian, that rash looks unpleasant. As for your sister in law, I can’t imagine being proud of my ignorance.

    1. Margaret Avatar

      I love tulips, but once they’ve stopped blooming, and you have to wait for the leaves to die down, it’s a very disturbing time of year for me. Lol My nephew had a very serious platelet condition and had many infusions and eventually had his spleen taken out. He was also on Accutane for acne. My sister-in-law is dismissive of medical care except when she needs it and is never thankful for the nurses and doctors, but puts any positive results 💯 down to prayer. Although I’m not criticizing the effects of prayer, I resent the way she takes advantage of the system without being grateful at all.

  3. Linda Avatar

    That eczema looks very sore! Beautiful photos, dear Margaret.

    1. Margaret Avatar

      I don’t know how painful it is, but I think it is itchy. 😩

  4. Doug M Avatar
    Doug M

    Okay my heart just busted, Ian that poor little guy! My niece had that too as a baby but I don’t recall it looking this serious! Please keep us posted Margaret… Okay, that scam text was scary (I was going to do a blog about this) but the back and forth with your daughter cracked me up! I’m afraid I know little what differences exist between these younger generations to tell by a text! 😄

    1. Margaret Avatar

      Eczema is unsightly and itchy. Both YD’s boys have it; they’re fair skinned like she is and she had it as a child. Now she has a bad case of rosacea (that she doesn’t treat the way she should, another story/frustration) She had the most gorgeous complexion until her early thirties. 🙁 OD does some of those abbreviations, but she does punctuate and capitalize.

  5. JT Twissel Avatar

    Poor baby. Sometimes the rashes are itchy and the baby’s nails need to be kept clean and smooth which is, in itself, a challenge, to prevent infection. Being pro natural remedies is okay but masking is the most natural way of limiting exposure to disease. Good luck with the tulips!

    1. Margaret Avatar

      My SIL wouldn’t believe you, even if you showed her 1,000 studies that prove that masks help prevent infection. I was clear with her that probably the only reason I didn’t come back from Ireland with Covid is that my friend and roomie started masking the minute she had any symptoms of what she thought was a cold. Beef tallow is a firm no for me and when I read about it, there’s no proof it helps at all and indications that it would make the eczema worse.

  6. Maureen Avatar
    Maureen

    I was just eyeing the tulips at the garden center this morning – I’m tempted. I vote for planting tulips in clusters of odd numbers, 5 or 7 or 9. Not sure why, but all the professional gardeners do this. Poor Ian, that must be a bit uncomfortable for him.

    1. Margaret Avatar

      I planted them in clusters of 3 because I bought so many. LOL I tried to put the parrot ones (that don’t come back for me) in corner spots so it won’t be as obvious. I’m excited to see what blooms in the spring! It may look sparse which will mean that I’ll have to buy MORE next year.

  7. Luftmentsch Avatar

    I’m sorry to read about Ian. Is there any treatment?

    I keep getting phoned by Indian call centres (but with disguised numbers that claim to come from Britain), claiming I need a new SIM card for my phone. This is so they can get my phone ID transferred to a phone they have so they can use it for two-factor authentication and buy things with my credit cards online. Fortunately, I was suspicious and didn’t fall for it. I also keep getting emails claiming I need to review a disputed payment on my AmEx card and I don’t even have an AmEx card!

    1. Margaret Avatar

      Like your so-called AmEx card, I get “receipts” for things I’ve bought on PayPal, which I don’t use! At least some of the scams are easy to spot. I never do anything over the phone or email/text; I contact the actual institution or business if possible. Generally, steroid cream is used, but sparingly since it thins the skin. Babies already have such delicate skin. I hope she can get it under control and then just use a good cream like Eucerin which is formulated to heal eczema-prone skin. Both YD’s boys have it; I think she did as well but outgrew it, which I hope they do also. However, she now has rosacea; that may somehow be connected?

  8. Betty Renfroe Avatar
    Betty Renfroe

    I’m sure not anti-vax! But beef tallow makes a wonderful ointment for dry skin. I’ve used it. Laura’s made it. His back looks so painful. Hope he’s doesn’t have to do steroid shots.
    Hurts me just to see his back.

    I returned Whistler to the library today. They didn’t have the book I asked for yet. I’m first in line for Barbara Kingsolver’s book when they get it. I’m reading “Wild Card Quilt”. It’s not great but it’s all I have.

    My brother loved tulips. They make me think of him! Can’t wait to see your colors in the spring!

    I don’t answer the phone unless I recognize the number. They can leave a message. I get a few stupid text messages and I mark them and delete.

  9. Margaret Avatar

    Beef tallow for eczema isn’t recommended although I’m not saying it might not be good for other things. I don’t know if his back is painful although it is itchy and he’s not sleeping as well as usual. Poor sweetie! Ooh, I didn’t know Kingsolver had a new book out. She’s another excellent writer! I will take MANY photos of the tulips and hope not to be disappointed.

  10. kayak woman Avatar

    I’ll come clean and say that I am “lightly” anti-vax. I am ALL FOR dTAP, MMR, and *definitely* polio and any other deadly disease. I was born before polio was available and my parents witnessed some people who caught it and died literally overnight so they were terrified the baby (me) they tried for most of 11 years to conceive would die. On the other hand, I have been wiggling out of flu shots for many years (easier to do now) and after getting the initial covid shot, then getting an extremely mild case of covid, I don’t get that either. If I have cold symptoms (rarely), I am willing and able to isolate for the duration so as not to infect others.

    I am laughing at the period at the end of the last sentence of text messages. I am 72 and well trained in English spelling, grammar, and punctuation. You KNOW I don’t write stuff like “how r u?” (and like OD, neither do my 40-ish kids). But I almost never put a period at the end of a text message. It’s not because I’m annoyed, at least not at the person texting me. Instead, as I have just thought through, I am annoyed at tech designers for not figuring out how to include such a common punctuation mark as a period on the main phone keyboard. I simply don’t want to switch to the keyboard that has the period just to type one character. (Long-time web UX designer here…)

    Did OD make Obro’s costume? I love it and I know she is a good seamstress.

    1. Margaret Avatar

      I don’t think she made the costume although she’s certainly capable of it. She’s an amazing seamstress and very creative. NOT from me! I had the flu once 31 years ago and never want it again, at least not at that level. Being a classroom teacher around hundreds of people every day encouraged me to get every vaccine available, and I mostly avoided serious illness while working, probably partly due to that and partly to my immune system. My mom got the first Covid shots and then none after that; she went to stores and didn’t mask that much yet never (to my knowledge) got Covid. I think some people are more immune to it than others. The text message thing was confusing. I always put a period at the end of a sentence, even in texting. It’s just the final sentence that sometimes doesn’t get one?

      1. kayak woman Avatar

        For me it is only the final sentence that I don’t bother with the period. That text message you got *was* confusing. Yeah (knock on wood) I think I am more immune to things than most.

    2. Margaret Avatar

      I would like to think that my immune system is strong, but it’s certainly not infallible.

  11. Susan Avatar
    Susan

    I think you will like planting tulips in clusters. The landscapers say plant in groups of odd numbers: 3,7,9. I love tulips, but the wildlife eats them on my property.
    My alternative is daffodils. Every Fall, I buy a bag of 25 King Alfred daffodils, dig a shallow circular hole and place the bulbs about an inch or two apart. In the Spring a large circle of flowers emerges. I’ve created a few island beds on my property.
    Hopefully there is a medication can help treat Ian’s eczema. A non-stop itch is terrible. There has to be a good solution.

    1. DB Stewart Avatar

      Poor little guy.
      I too struggle with text language “culture” but I have learned that if I “go there” with my young millennial offspring, then I am left on “read” ha. They like to tease me about the way I use a smiley face: I prefer 🙂 instead of 🙂 so that the nose is represented. Ha, that is definitely a me problem.

      1. Margaret Avatar

        Ironically, in the text message of your comment, I could see the two different smiley faces, but in my comment section, WordPress has turned them into the same emoji with NO NOSE. Annoying.

    2. Margaret Avatar

      I did decide to plant them in clusters; that way I’ll also be able to tell which types come up and which don’t. I only bought two parrot tulip bags since they only bloomed one year for me. Most other tulips are hardier than that and they thrive in our moderate to cooler climate. I’ve heard from friends that deer LOVE to feast on tulips! Daffs are a great alternate and your arrangement of them sounds beautiful. Steroids are the treatment and my daughter doesn’t like to use them too frequently or for too long.

  12. AC Avatar

    If you type on the phone or tablet, it will add a person for you if you hit a double space. Maybe Gen Z doesn’t double space.

    1. Margaret Avatar

      We are the last double spacer generation due to the death of the typewriter. I still want to double space but my correcting software doesn’t like that.

  13. Janie Goltz Avatar
    Janie Goltz

    Poor Ian. I’ve had eczema most of my life so I know how it feels. Telling someone with eczema not to scratch is like telling the sun not to come up in the morning. Fie on beef tallow. That’s ridiculous. Mother didn’t take us to doctors very often, but she did seek the care I needed for eczema. I ignore all that stuff about how you’re supposed to text and what it means to different generations if you do certain things. If they’re going to be offended by the use of a period at the end of a sentence, that’s their problem. 🤣

    Love,
    Janie

    1. Margaret Avatar

      Babies especially don’t understand why they’re uncomfortable and fuss (or don’t sleep) which is miserable for everyone. I hope YD finds something that will help him. His back looked better yesterday so perhaps the flare up is fading. I do dislike texts that have no punctuation or capitalization but understand that older and younger generations do things differently. I try not to judge…doesn’t always work.

      1. Janie Goltz Avatar
        Janie Goltz

        I adore my daughter-in-law because she texts in complete sentences and uses punctuation. So do I.

  14. Robin Avatar
    Robin

    Hi Margaret, oh, poor Ian! My mum and I both suffer/suffered with eczema. As a child my mum was bedridden for a few months it was so bad. Since my early 20’s I have used an all natural bees wax cream and only have had a couple flair ups in all those years. I know nothing about the different generational texting techniques, you taught me something!😆 Take care Margaret.❤️

    1. Margaret Avatar

      I’ve read so much on-line about helpful treatments; they vary from person to person. YD has some Eucerin cream for eczema that may help a little. Topical steroids work but don’t last and can’t be used for very long on delicate baby skin. I hope they outgrow it although it doesn’t sound like you did, not completely. My texts tend to be much more grammatical than is popular with the latest generations.

  15. Michael Avatar

    Poor Ian. That looks awful. I have what I think are chigger bites on my torso from working out in the backyard cutting brush. I have whined and complained about the itching, but after seeing Ian’s back, I should shut my mouth.

    I don’t usually plant tulips because here in Virginia because the bulbs only reproduce for a couple of years. Not like daffodils that go on and on year after year. Plus the deer love tulips, but stay away from the daffodils.

    Once I texted my daughter about something and I ended it with three dots. She thought I was mad at her!

    1. addofio Avatar

      Chiggers! Yuck. You have my sympathy. I went to college in Ohio (many many years ago), and got them many times. I used to paint clear fingernail polish over them. The theory was that they breathe through the skin and it deprived them of oxygen. Don’t know if it worked, but it seemed to. Makes me itchy just to think about them. Fortunately, they haven’t invaded Oregon. Yet, anyway.

      1. Margaret Avatar

        I’d never heard of chiggers until I visited Iowa, and they freaked out when I started to sit on the lawn. We do that all the time in Washington without a second thought! Fingernail polish has many uses. 🙂

      2. Michael Avatar

        The bites itch like crazy. I think they are a tiny bit better today. I have never had chigger bites before. Hopefully for you, they will never get to Oregon!

      3. Margaret Avatar

        I hope they continue to improve! Hopefully not to Oregon or Washington.

    2. Margaret Avatar

      Eczema is miserable and both YD’s boys have it. Sometimes it’s better and then they have an outbreak. Chiggers, ugh! I don’t think we have them here; I’m thankful for that. I planted the majority of my tulips in 2013 and although a number of them didn’t come back (the parrot tulips mostly), many of them are still blooming. I know I’m supposed to dig up the bulbs every year but there’s no way that’s happening! John loves to use the three dots. I’m not even sure what they mean but I wouldn’t assume angry. I often use emojis to clarify what I’m texting because it’s difficult (impossible?) to figure out tone and can cause misunderstandings.

      1. Michael Avatar

        I think chiggers are mostly in the southeast, and maybe some in the midwest. I have never had chigger bites before. I am not even sure that they are chigger bites, but they definitely are not mosquito bites.

      2. Margaret Avatar

        I looked them up and they are nasty looking little arachnids. It says that they’re most prevalent in regions that offer a combination of high heat, high humidity and thick vegetation. So, the PNW is probably safe.

      3. Michael Avatar

        Hot and humid fits Virginia!

  16. Ed Avatar

    It’s called rally scoring and has been a thing for a long long time. I think they made the change to speed up the games and retain interest.

    I’m not sure what generation my kids are but they don’t even communicate with letters anymore, capitalized or not. It is mostly be these weird emojis that they have created.

    Not sure if you’ve been to the Dutch town up the road from here known for their tulip festival. They seem to just fill entire beds with tulips with no order to them.

    1. Margaret Avatar

      I much prefer this not-so-new scoring; it does make the games move faster. Since I’m terrible at recognizing emojis, I would be completely lost! I wanted to visit that Dutch town, but I wasn’t there at the right time of year. We have lots of tulip farms here too, but they’re a 2-hour drive away and very crowded during daffodil and tulip season.

  17. Wakinguponthewrongsideof Avatar

    oh the scam things are getting ridiculous. I don’t trust anything snymore

    1. Margaret Avatar

      Luckily, both Millennial daughters tend to capitalize and punctuate, so I was reasonably sure that it wasn’t them. I am very distrustful these days!

  18. Matt H Shifley Avatar

    Ann Patchett’s quote is such a grounded way to frame garden therapy. Planting future beauty is always the best antidote to heavy family worries.
    Team Clusters all the way! They look far more organic, and you won’t be stressing over empty spaces if a few don’t pop up in April.
    Hope poor Ian finds relief from that stubborn eczema soon (without rubbing cooking fat on himself!). Enjoy the beautiful 60-degree weather, Mari’s catnip antics, and your trip to McLendon’s, Margaret!

    1. Margaret Avatar

      I’m already excited to see what comes up in the spring; I hope I won’t be disappointed! P.S. I did decide on clusters although not big ones. Ian’s back looked better yesterday, so that’s a positive. We’re definitely having second summer!

  19. Steve Avatar

    I’ve always heard never to put bulbs in rows, so I think clusters might be nice. Monty Don, of Gardener’s World on the BBC, suggests randomly scattering bulbs and planting them where they land.

    I laughed at your daughter’s text. That would have set off my scam alarm bells too!

    I’ve never heard of a libero — I would have thought it was a political thing. (And the opposite of your sister in law!)

    1. Margaret Avatar

      Because of the shape of the flowerbed, rows would have been nice, but I knew they wouldn’t be the best option. I did choose clusters although not big ones. I hope they look OK; I’m excited for spring although it’s not even winter yet. 🙂 OD does use some of those abbreviations in her texts, but I didn’t tell her that. YD tends to be more grammatical.

  20. Midwest Mark Avatar

    Beef tallow?! Fine and dandy, until you happen upon a pack of dogs.

    I’m Team Text Punctuation, too. The irony in her not using periods while dissing Gen Z’s lack of grammar skills is hilarious!

    1. Margaret Avatar

      Apparently, not using a period at the end of the message is a thing to show you’re not mad/upset. (?) I didn’t know that. Generally, she does capitalize and punctuate. HAHA on the dogs! At their other house (their dad’s), there is a dog, so YD will have to be careful if she does use some of it.

      1. Midwest Mark Avatar

        Nope. Sorry. I refuse to accept the no period thing! I THOUGHT ALL CAPS MEANT YOU WERE MAD.

        (See? I ended that with a period.)

      2. Margaret Avatar

        I can barely remember what the various emojis mean, so I’m not about to learn a bunch of new rules. At the end of a sentence should be a period. PERIOD!
        In my last comment on your blog, I used all caps and I wasn’t mad, just wanted to emphasize.

      3. Midwest Mark Avatar

        All caps made sense in that context!

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