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Stories of the San Juans

I would love to say that the trip was idyllic and perfect. Like most events involving people (especially one who didn’t want to be there and was negative, cutting and angry the whole time), it had its beautiful ups and some terrific downs. I can’t go into any details except to express my disappointment and shock and my sinking feeling that this will have long-lasting ramifications. Vagueblogging, eh?

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This boy loved the ferry and kept asking us numerous times on the 3-hour drive up there, “When will we get on the boat?”

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This is our boat, the Samish. It was HUGE! I very much enjoyed the no-nonsense attitude of the WSDOT employees who called out a Ford pick-up whose car alarm kept going off, as well as an Audi from Oregon, “You will need to go and sit in your car for the rest of the trip since you can’t turn off your alarm.” I was also amused at docking when the foot passengers were firmly instructed, “Unless you get off NOW, you will then be waiting for 160 cars to leave this boat!”

Later on from Friday Harbor, we watched our ferry come in with another load.

On their whale watching tour the day before we arrived, Older Daughter and family saw orcas and porpoises. The boys were thrilled!

Have I ever mentioned that blue is my favorite color? 🙂

This is the view from OD’s campsite of the lodge where I stayed. I’m the far left top room. It was quite a luxurious room with a comfortable pillow top bed and large deck. It also had internet and electricity, unlike the glamping tents where the daughters were. However, I only went back here to sleep, so it was kind of a waste of money.

This photo doesn’t do the place justice.

As expensively rustic as the lodge was, I never saw another soul there. It was beyond quiet, almost creepy.

I sent this morning photo to John to let him know that I’d finally figured out the Keurig coffee maker. You have to do everything in the correct order, or you get NOTHING. The resort had a breakfast mess tent for everyone where we had excellent food choices, and then we would head for the general store for a decent espresso.

I can’t possibly list all the outdoor activities for families and kids at this place: water stuff like rowboats, pedal boats, water trikes, as well as volleyball, swimming, soccer, full size chess and checkers, a putting green, fishing, etc. Or simply sitting around a fire with a package of graham crackers, some chocolate bars and a bag of marshmallows.

We had to try the local brewery. The food was decent and the Mexican dark lager I ordered was a win.

However, the Salty Fox coffee shop can’t spell my name. It’s not the first time I’ve been Magret–which is better than Morgrat, or that one time that I was Barbara. Hmmm.

The highlights mostly involved spending time with my grandsons and daughters. We had some hilarious conversations around the campfire.

I still didn’t achieve that four grandson photo I’ve been craving. Anders was off doing his own thing; he’s very three!

Isn’t this touching? It’s the three oldest grandsons’ special stuffies: Anders’ brown rabbit, Sharky’s yellowish Roary and Obro’s white Roary. I was never into stuffed animals myself; I had a precious (and bedraggled) blankie.

In home news, my deck is finished: a few boards repaired, cleaned off and re-stained. It still looks decent for a thirty-year-old deck. Now I have to figure out how to put the table back up there. I think I’ll wait for John.

I saw this sunrise a few nights ago and drove around my neighborhood to try to capture its beauty. When I was young, this is what I thought heaven looked like.

I came home from the San Juans to this explosion of flowers. There is already one dead one, but more will bloom.

Perhaps that can give me some hope for the tense situation I described at the beginning of this post. But sometimes, too many bridges have been burned.

Comments

41 responses to “Stories of the San Juans”

  1. Pipe Tobacco Avatar
    Pipe Tobacco

    Oh no. I am sorry there were troubles.

    Your deck to my eyes looks like a newly installed deck. 30 years in our parts even with care, would never look that good.

    1. Margaret Avatar

      Yes, many troubles to go along with the joys. My late husband did quality work! He would be happy that I haven’t put a different deck on; my next one won’t be wood which would upset him.

  2. raincharm Avatar
    raincharm

    The trip pictures are great. I especially would have liked to hear the grandsons conversations. How they think and sometimes how they use words can be insightful and entertaining. I am sorry it was not all positive and hope those points can be smoothed.

    1. Margaret Avatar

      The boys said some funny and quirky things; I wish I had written them down. The frogs were very loud and strange sounding, and they made lots of creative remarks about that. I doubt that the situation can be smoothed over but I have no control over that. 🙁

      1. sillygirl Avatar
        sillygirl

        “but I have no control over that” – then it is not your problem. It IS unnerving to witness it however.

      2. Margaret Avatar

        I have no control over it but it affects me immensely.

  3. Michael Avatar

    I always enjoy reading your posts. Your photos are great and your blog entry took me to a place that I’ve never been and have always wanted to visit. I am sorry about the difficulty you encountered. Blue is my favorite color too.

    1. Margaret Avatar

      With four of us taking photos, it was hard to choose the ones I wanted. I like to vary people with scenery with whatever quirky things that strike my fancy. Thank you for your supportive words. This issue isn’t going anywhere and will affect me personally. I may eventually blog about it.

  4. AC Avatar

    Too bad there was such a stain on such a trip. You’ve got my mind reeling with a possible explanation. I have come up with something or someone in my little head.

    1. Margaret Avatar

      It was an unexpected unpleasantness and one I wasn’t at all prepared for. That makes it worse.

  5. Maureen Avatar
    Maureen

    I admire your ability to detach from difficulties you cannot control, though I’m sure they cause a lot of sadness and dismay. The pictures show the islands to be so beautiful and full of nature. I would have chosen the lodge too, though I’m puzzled by its emptiness at this time of year. It looks like an ideal vacation locale.

    1. Margaret Avatar

      Exactly, because the issues affect me directly although I can’t control them. I wish it were different! The islands are well-known for their beauty. I was away from the lodge from before 8 a.m. to after 10 p.m. so there could have been others there. I just never saw them!

  6. Suzanne Avatar

    The ferry ride and the resort look wonderful, and oh, Margaret (Magret??? lol), those pictures of you and the grandkids are GORGEOUS.

    I am so sorry there was tension and disgruntlement on the trip. That’s not fun for anyone. It seems that traveling with someone is a really good way to figure out if you are compatible — traveling brings out all sorts of personality quirks and characteristics that you might not otherwise experience. Hoping that whatever the outcome is, it arrives swiftly and achieves peace.

    1. Margaret Avatar

      It was a beautiful place and the weather mostly cooperated. It sprinkled a little and then rained Sunday morning, but it didn’t pour. Having a group together can be tricky because there are always differences of opinion; priorities and needs vary from person to person. We had an age range from 8 months to 69 and three active little boys plus the baby. That is stressful all on its own. I wish we’d been able to get one with Anders in it, but we have to grab the moments.

  7. Siobhan Avatar
    Siobhan

    I laughed out loud when you said your name once was transcribed to Barbara – how did that happen !!!
    Vague blogging is completely understandable
    The boys look happy and happy and seeing Orcas in the wild would be a dream of mine
    Your decking looks fab too
    Siobhan x

    1. Margaret Avatar

      If you say Margaret fast, it might sound like Barbara? I am open about most things, but not as much when it involves other people. The boys had a great time. The baby was very good except the last 40 minutes in the car. It was rough! My daughter and I sang Wheels on the Bus, Bingo and Old McDonald until we were hoarse. He likes singing.

  8. Doug M Avatar
    Doug M

    Margaret I can hardly keep up with all your adventures but your photos here were warm, beautiful, amazing! Of course you’ve piqued my interest with the “vague blogging” as you’re usually so upfront but I will just assume it’s some unpleasant family drama. The important thing is, it looks and sounds like you had a great time. :^)

    1. Margaret Avatar

      Thank you, Doug! The weekend took a lot of effort (and money) so the fact that it wasn’t great at times (the opposite) was a disappointment. Family drama, yes. Perhaps not resolvable.

  9. Ed Avatar

    My family has always dealt with our disagreements quickly and then forgave just as quickly. My wife’s side of my family must be a bit like yours. Things tend to fester for long periods of time and erupt at the worst times to deal with such things. I’ve always struggled with dealing with things that way as I’m sure they are when I am so quick to forgive and move on.

    1. Margaret Avatar

      That’s exactly right. It’s much healthier to forgive (not forget) and move forward. I wouldn’t say on because hurtful words are impossible to forget, especially immediately. They irrevocably change the relationship. I am an open communicator but some other people in my family are not.

  10. Betty Renfroe Avatar
    Betty Renfroe

    Because you are the only parent living, you feel a giant responsibility to hold the two limbs of your family connected. It’s so much easier with two parents grasping the limbs. Slowly after my husband passed there are less events with both my daughters. They are not divided but have their own families and interests. I try to enjoy both. They will have to build their connection. I think you should just let go of this being YOUR responsibility. Enjoy each and don’t expect it to be “all together”.

    The trip seems to have ended up with many positive moments for the young ones to remember. Focus on that. You can’t fix everything!

    It’s so hot and humid in the south that I’m miserable. I think as I look at the forecast to see when it’ll only be 89, am I wishing my life away?

    1. Margaret Avatar

      Wise words, my friend. I often feel the burden of being the only parent living. I’m often caught in the middle and depended on too heavily, although I do want to be supportive and caring. The young ones loved the ferry and the adventures. There were many fun times as well; unfortunately, sometimes the major issues overshadowed them. 82 here and quite pleasant. I would prefer 10 degrees cooler but won’t complain.

  11. Linda Avatar

    Dear Margaret, I totally understand what you said about other’s anger 😠 😡 👿 or bad moods that you have no control over affect you deeply.
    I am a very sensitive 🥺 person and I totally get it.
    Your photos are gorgeous, dear friend, and the little boy who enjoyed the water and the boat 🚢 ride makes me very happy. For you as well. I have never been on this type of excursion, but it is one that I would absolutely love ❤️
    I love the water and I love nature. Both bring me a sense of joy and peace.

    Thank you so much for sharing, and I appreciate your visits and kind comments on my blog. I also appreciate your friendship.
    I am glad you caught the humour in the meme about holding our breath for 20 minutes. I thought it was cute and funny 😁 😂 and was glad to share this lighthearted meme.

    I hope you have a lovely week.

    1. Margaret Avatar

      I learned a long time ago that anger is a secondary emotion, so when I feel it, I look deeply inside myself. What am I actually feeling? Hurt? Scared? I can be sensitive but also hard-nosed about my boundaries. This situation crossed the boundaries and I’m afraid there may be no going back. I will try to accept that and move forward gracefully. You would have loved everything except the mosquitoes. (not too bad though and I didn’t get bit)

      1. Linda Avatar

        Hi Margaret, oh, I can be very tough at times as well!!! If someone takes their anger out on me enough, I will step back and re-evaluate my “friendship”. Life is too short to have to deal with things like that, we have enough difficulties of our own to go through, we certainly don’t need to deal with any untoward behaviour of others.

      2. Margaret Avatar

        I don’t deal with toxic people in my life, but sometimes have to tolerate them because otherwise, I won’t get to see others in their group that aren’t toxic. If that makes any sense!

  12. Susan Avatar
    Susan

    The island looks beautiful and the lodge makes a very comfortable place to stay. For someone (like me) that would never sleep in a tent, the lodge is very appealing.
    I can’t imagine managing 4 little boys when living in tents. It just sounds entirely like too much work. The extra work/pressure put on your YD with the youngest two boys is a lot to expect.
    I am sorry there were some tense moments but can understand how this might happen. As the mother, you likely do not want to take sides, but I’d very carefully taking stock of what exactly was going on. There is likely enough blame to spread to both/all. Nothing is one-sided.
    The activities sound wonderful and the boys had a great time and that is what is most important. You can take joy in that.

    1. Margaret Avatar

      I think the boys enjoyed themselves. These canvas tents for glamping are sturdy and have a queen bed and a futon in them, as well as a table and chairs. They are quite nice. (no electricity or internet though) I’m concerned about where the issues go from here, especially since they do affect me directly. Relationships and people are complicated.

  13. Luftmentsch Avatar

    I’m glad you mostly had a good time, but I’m sorry to hear about the family (?) drama. I don’t envy you going, though, as I (and E and my parents) are not outdoors types at all, although my parents used to be sporty. The deserted lodge does look a little creepy and reminds me a bit of the hotel from Twin Peaks.

    1. Margaret Avatar

      I don’t know if I just wasn’t in the lodge when others were; there were cars parked there, so I’m assuming other guests? I love the outdoors although I didn’t love the mosquitoes much. I didn’t get bit though!

  14. JT Twissel Avatar

    Sorry to hear about the downer. I remember being told on the ferry to get off right away or have to wait. It’s amazing people have to be told that!

    1. Margaret Avatar

      Or that they’re not supposed to leave their cars unattended in the ferry line at boarding time. Like the lady in front of us! The ferry employees had to direct our line around that car. Life is certainly full of surprises, not all of them pleasant ones.

  15. kayak woman Avatar

    My daughter and bonus daughter/niece still travel with their favorite childhood stuffies when they get together. They are nearing 40 and their animals are totally falling apart. I must admit, I keep a couple of childhood faves myself. Medicine Duck, a gift I got when I had my tonsils out at age 7 and “rabbit”… Mom taught “home-ec” in my high school when I was *in* high school. This included starting a retail store in the school where they sold (among many other things) stuffed animals that the students made in a sewing class. “rabbit” was a little lopsided and didn’t sell. Mom and I couldn’t abandon it so I adopted it.

    1. Margaret Avatar

      I think that’s wonderful! Both daughters have their special childhood animals-OD had a cat called Sparkle Diamond. That was before we had a real cat; she’s always been a cat lover. YD had Fat Duck, being a fan of birds. Anders is obsessed with his rabbit. I wonder if it’s because he goes between two households, so that’s his security.

  16. kayak woman Avatar

    P.S. I also have my childhood dog’s favorite toy ever. A rubber mouse that still squeaks.

    1. Margaret Avatar

      That’s a fun toy to keep!

  17. Mary Williams Avatar

    Vacations can bring out the bad. Last summer I took my family on a cruise to Alaska, and my daughter decided to bring up all kinds of grievances from her past. She was just awful to everyone, it was one of the worst weeks of my life, and she and my son and daughter in law have barely spoken since. She almost never gets to see her nephews. It breaks my heart. My family isn’t like that at all, we apologize and move on. I don’t see anything changing, and it’s killing me.

    1. Margaret Avatar

      Oh, Mary, I’m so sorry! That sounds terrible. We look forward to vacation get aways and then they turn into a disappointment–or worse. I expected some stresses with the four little boys, NOT the adults. There were still some wonderful times although my memories of the trip will be somewhat tainted. I hope your situation works out eventually. I hope mine does too!!

  18. J Avatar

    I am sorry that your trip was marred, but I have to say that that feels par for the course for vacations. SIGH. I would love to have a perfect vacation. I am not suggesting that you didn’t know that, and that you expected a perfect vacation, just commiserating with the frustration of it. It looks beautiful though! So beautiful.

    1. Margaret Avatar

      Is it our expectations that let us down? In this case, it was a couple uncalled for blow ups, not by the children (as I would have expected) but from one adult in particular–who acted like a petulant and mean teenager.

  19. kayak woman Avatar

    Thinking about your vacation overnight… My brother and I had our squabbles as children but as adults — on our own “turf” (his house or my house) — we always got along well. It was when we returned to our family cabin that we got into arguments. I came to recognize that being back in our childhood family dynamic (with our parents there) exacerbated that. Not the same as a vacation exactly and my brother had a chronic illness which didn’t help things.

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